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Writer's pictureRandy Swaim

Faith Based Leadership: Beware of Depending on Emotions and Why People Will Use Them.

For this blog, I seek to call attention to one critical aspect that many do not realize in our society but leaders understand it. I offer a simple picture from the King I serve and then one correlation from my journey.


Faith Based Leadership:  Beware of Depending on Emotions and Why People Will Use Them.

Most people realize that the King that I serve actually interacted with people in a very calm and centered way whether they were low or high on the social ladder and regardless of how other people saw the ones with which He interacted. The one time that He let His anger go was when the liars and manipulative people (money changers) disrespected his temple to take money from other folks. Never forget that strong leaders always remain calm and centered even in challenging situations. Let me offer a simple situation in my life. Years ago and was the only 1 of 2 times where I almost had to use my martial arts to defend a couple in public.


My girlfriend at the time and I walked out of a dance club that we were regulars at and many friends enjoying dancing. As I walked her to her car and we were chatting I could tell there was a situation probably about a hundred feet away from us and it was obvious that here were 3 “bad dudes” picking on what appeared to be a business casual looking guy and his girlfriend. I told my girlfriend “If I go over there, you get in your car and lock the door and you do not come out until I tell you…understand?” With big eyes, she nodded. I could tell that of the 3, there was one real big guy who was beating his chest essentially….1 of the 3 did not want to be there….and 1 guy appeared a loose cannon. I strategized that the first punch or kick, I would take out the loose cannon.


There came a time that the big guy grabbed the professional guy from behind and I looked at my girlfriend as I took a step there to ensure she was getting in her car. When I arrived there the business guy was trying to bite the bad guys hand to make him let go. I walked up and grabbed the bad guys hand and leaned down and said to the professional guy, “It is ok, let him go!” When I felt his teeth let go I wrist locked the bad guy so he could not strike me and spun the guy out of the hold. I then stepped between and simply told the big dude calmly and confidently “You can sing, shout, yell or beat your chest….BUT THE FIGHT IS OVER!” The issue went for a few minutes but did not go any further. Afterwards, my girlfriend simply highlighted that “…it was really good to see the military officer come out in you but even more important…..you could see in their eyes that they did not know what to do with someone who was outnumbered and yet cool, calm and confident.


There are 2 reasons people try to engage your emotions so keep them in mind because when your emotions go crazy, others can:

MANIPULATE you

CONTROL you.


Don’t let that happen to you. Leaders not only Stay Centered and Calm but they also minimize the risk of generating the emotions in their people. Remember, as Tyler Jack Harris said:


If you want to achieve something….operate on COMMITMENT, not Emotions!

- Tyler Jack Harris




Randy Swaim, Coaching for Relevance, LLC

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